Assistant: Is there mustard in hummus?
Me: Hummus? Umm. No? Do you not like mustard?
Assistant: I'm allergic. I also think it's just gross.
Me: I don't think I liked mustard until college. Maybe your tastebuds will change. One time I was so poor that I bought deli meat, slathered mustard and shredded cheese on it, rolled it up and ate it. That was my dinner everyday senior year. I like mustard a lot now.
Assistant: That reminds me of this thing I saw on Facebook. It was like, bacon. Like, a steak I think. A steak wrapped in bacon. And it had stuff inside of it. Like spices and maybe cheese. But it was covered in bacon and cooked that way. I don't even like bacon but it looked good. Bacon is kinda gross. Yeah. Um. I don't think there was mustard in it though. But it reminded me of this. I don't know why. I just... it's like...
Then she slowly walked away backwards.