that sweet blue crystal

Sunday, July 26, 2015


I got a new car. The Prius C Three. Her name is Heisenberg.

I wasn't sure if this was something I wanted to add to my plate just now. But my old car was a quadriplegic and I felt so bad for it because we'd been through so much together (commuting 100 miles per day for a year, my first nanny job, moving across the country, my second nanny job, everything that ever happened to me in Nashville, road trips all over the damn place, moving back from Nashville, getting back on my feet after that disaster was over, my third nanny job, picking up the slack when Brad's car died, getting my new job, getting my new everything...) but it was time.

I'm super pissed (of course!) because I just paid for my new tags on my old car. Haven't even gotten them in the mail yet. I also was required to get an emissions test because it had been three years or whatever. That was another $50 that I threw at it. Plus that water pump disaster. Last week there was another nail in another tire and magically the tire guys changed their tune from "your tires are fine" to "wow these are really bad and you're going to need to replace them really soon!" which was such a shitty thing to say to me.

Afterwards I noticed that my car was driving strangely. I could feel pressure down by my pedals and it started making weird noises and Brad told me that something something was mis-firing and look, I'm not pretending to know a lot about cars, but it seems to me that things should never mis-fire when my living body is traveling high speeds inside of it.

Talked it over with my dad, financial things bla bla, and we decided that leasing for 3 years was my best option. I got a great trade-in deal for my old one (by the way, it's my personal philosophy to find a car salesman who you trust. Is this easy? No, bitch, nothing in life is easy. It requires networking and trial and error and look, if you're 30 and you can't figure these things out I can't help you, I'm not your dad) and my monthly payments are way less than I was expecting. I drove it back to my parents' house, then I drove it to Telly's (which is like. um, the best food in my parents' town / the entire world). Slammed a tuna melt and then hopped on the highway to take it home. It's in my garage. LOL. Why wouldn't it be? But anyway... it has a navigation system. It hooks up to my phone right away with all of its blue teeth. It plays all my music and I have hands-free calling. It's so stupid!!! It also has all-electric mode or something? Brad was reading the statistics from our drive and said it was really cool?

But you guys? I’m almost 29. I've endured a lot to get where I am today. I deserve a nice car, and more than that, I need to believe I deserve a nice car. I had to think about what was going to stay on the road for the next three years, what I wouldn’t feel embarrassed pulling up to meetings in, what I could point to in a parking garage and say, “That’s me,” without cringing. My gray Yaris made me cringe. The dark cloth interior made me feel like I was wrapped in cheap wet towels. It was one tape player short of convincing me that I was a middleclass suburban teen who scored his grandma’s old car as his sixteenth birthday present.

But I only bought it for the color.