So is this how Candy Crush works? You get to a certain point relatively early on in the game and that's just it? You're stuck on that level for several days, until you get frustrated and buy more lives and boosters? Fuck bringing all the ingredients down, and fuck clearing all the jelly. I got all three cherries down and two of those weird peach looking things and had 1 move left. Forget it! Plus the amount of times I screamed, "ONE SIMPLY CANNOT CLEAR ALL THE JELLY IN 12 MOVES. IT'S NOT POSSIBLE."

Last night my old boss sent me a video of Avery wishing me a Merry Christmas. I was distracted by how tall she looked, wearing one of her old dresses as a t-shirt and pants that were an inch too short. He told me that she still talks about me all the time and is doing well in school. I started tearing up at that moment, just as Brad was calling to FaceTime me. I honestly can't even talk about Avery without crying because I miss her so much. I miss her more than I've ever missed anyone. I so desperately wish my final hours with her in Nashville hadn't been so utterly destroyed by the chaos of moving and remembering to take out her car seat and leave them my keys and kiss them all a hundred times and tying up every loose end imaginable while simultaneously dealing with a melodramatic and emotionally aggressive roommate... I sobbed the entire way back that night after leaving because I knew I'd never see her again, because I knew I'd never go back to Nashville again. I can't bring myself to take my pictures of her off my phone and save them somewhere on my computer, because I still want to see her everyday. But seeing her on my phone triggers an incurable heartbreak and the cycle never ends.

Ladies, cry to your men on FaceTime and they will propose a plan to go see Jonny Greenwood in Knoxville so that you can stop in Nashville and see the family you used to nanny for. Do that so all your dreams can come true.

I don't work today, so Brad and I are going to Disneyland this afternoon. Gonna do Christmas shopping and go on the rollercoaster. Probably won't get there til like 5 PM. Please don’t murder us, but if you do have to murder us just make sure it’s in a way that makes national news. Get creative, show your work.