thoughts brought to you by being awake since 3 am

Saturday, September 21, 2013

  • Sorry to be the bearer of bad news, but if you have a visual visceral reaction to Comic Sans, or any other type of font, you should probably go take a nap somewhere and then get back to me when you’re ready to act like a rational human being.
  • Whenever I’m hanging out with two or more people who are busy showing off their phone apps to each other, I silently freak out over how inane and boring and ridiculous they are acting. Lately I have been biding my time during these moments by writing vignettes about this occurrence. Every vignette is titled App Off, and it’s just you nerds furiously showing off your Apps. I have written at least 20 of them, and remember exactly zero.
  • Had a dream some lady kept trying to mouth words to me from across the room and I couldn’t understand her at all, so I kept feigning shock or laughter, whichever I felt was appropriate.
  • Also I was a weather lady and gave Aaron Paul a sexy back massage while giving him weather updates? “A heat wave, coming from the south."