an open letter to nashville

Thursday, January 24, 2013

You know what’s so infuriating about people who give back-handed compliments or other snide but dressed down comments? They’re always dumb cowards, which is just a totally brutal combination.

Here’s the thing(s):   

1.    I’m smart enough to know what it is you’re actually trying to say, and the implication that I may not be speaks way more to your intelligence than mine. I’ve been living life as a genius since I came out of my mother’s vagina, so why an individual might think that I have a blind spot for casually-inserted and poorly-disguised insults is beyond me. My head’s not that far up my own ass, thank you.

2.    I was raised to keep my mouth shut in public and do my shit talking behind closed doors. Show some class. Just be nice. Niceness should be a default.

3.    If I absolutely cannot control my urge to say something negative to someone, I have the courage to say what I want to say plainly. I have an across-the-board level of respect for all human beings and animals, so if I have something that needs to be said, you’re gonna get it handed to you straight.

These types need to fix themselves. Start reading real books. Change therapists. Go to the gym more. Eat better food. Get a hobby. Stop projecting your personal dissatisfaction onto every person you come in contact with in a feeble effort to superficially feel better.

I work everyday on improving my mental state and the environment around me, and I feel like I have nothing to hide or be ashamed of anymore.

Ultimately, y'all just need to be more like me.