Yesterday I took myself to the dentist so that I could pathetically apologize for not making my appointment last week and beg him to forgive me. He took a quick look at my teeth, told me they were perfect, and then I went on a long drive.

It's my favorite driving route / spot to sit and feel like myself. I've been going up there since high school. I've been going there for over ten years.

I went home and took a nap that was, apparently, a result of the Xanax hangover. And lasted for five hours. When I woke up at 7:30 (PM!), I texted my friend saying I was going to the beach. Because a lot of my friends are losers, I went by myself and sat in the sand eating a Breakfast Jack like it was 2008 or something. The weather was perfect. A warm 59 degrees, and very light breeze. Hardly any traffic on PCH. Nearly full moon. It was a great moment. I was proud of myself for being spontaneous and doing what I felt like doing. And having the freedom to do so.

Later tonight I’m going to a little party for my friends' baby. I guess it’s not really a party, but some important friends are having us over to meet their little dude, so I have to make sure my boobs are covered and that I don’t get sloppy. I have been okay in the past being the friend who vomits at their college friends' party and admits to them that I dropped half a sandwich behind their space heater and couldn’t be bothered to fish it out. But I don’t think I should do that tonight.