So my Juggalo is at the age where she repeats everything. I mean... EV. ER. Y. THI. NG. This morning she kept saying, "You're stupid! You're stupid!" while laughing hysterically. She doesn't even know what that means. She just knows that we all reacted very strongly to her saying the word "stupid" so she thought, hey! Why not keep saying it? That will surely give me all of the attention and send my adults into a shame spiral of sorrow!

And here is a conversation we just had:

Me: Are you done with your blueberries?
Juggalo: Yes I'm done.
Me: What about this big one? Just have this one big one! It's so big!
Juggalo: (screaming) NO. I DON'T WANT THAT ONE. GO AWAY.
Me: (under my breath) Wow. What. A. Bitch.
Juggalo: I'm not a bitch. I'm a caterpillar.


Um, actually, bitch? You're a ladybug.

(And for the person who is about to email me and threaten my authority as a caregiver, I'm just kidding. She doesn't even know what she's saying. She doesn't even know the difference between a caterpillar and a ladybug, so I'm going to just go out on a limb and guess that she doesn't know what the word "bitch" means either. And I'm never going to mutter the word again. Not even under my breath. Why am I having a panic attack right now? Look at what you guys do to me! This is why I don't allow blog comments! Jesus Christ.)

PS: She's currently on my lap, cradling a small stuffed animal, telling me to "shhh!" because it's a baby and it's sleeping. And now she is kissing it. So, no, she's not a bitch. She's actually the cutest person who ever walked the planet. Sorry.