sunday blues

Sunday, November 14, 2010

On Sundays I totally want to not live anymore. Every Sunday, there is at least one moment when I say to myself, "It would have been convenient to have not woken up today."

Sundays are boring and guilt-filled days. You regret everything you've done and haven't done and you're stuck in a place where you can't really do anything because a bunch of religious-types decided a long time ago that Sunday was Punishment Day and all the banks and fun stores and cool things should be shut down early or unavailable. This is the day you sit on your hands and watch your life spin out of control all around you. Don't even say anything because you won't get a response... It's Sunday.

Oddly enough, I never felt that way when I was working my retail job because I liked feeling unimportant and didn't mind being pushed around until Monday when my routine would kick in again. Because my schedule was different and interesting. It's all leftover emotional stuff from childhood, like that famous 60 Minutes quote from My So-Called Life that says something about the ticking clock and how it feels like it's actually counting down your life. I always felt that way Sunday nights growing up. After Sunday, the week was over for good and what you've done and not done was in the books for life. It's like the night before running a marathon that you have to run to save your life or something. Who the heck wants to wake up and run that day?

Not this lady.