it always comes back to franco

Sunday, March 7, 2010

When I go through bouts of sleeping 20-hour days, I end up having really meaningful thoughts in the middle of the night. An hour ago I was like, “man this is so deep and meaningful I should write a blog about it so my readers don’t think all I care about is laughing and being obviously better at laughing, but actually that really is all I care about.”

I was just wondering if you guys remembered the ban on gay marriage that passed, the same day as Prop 2. For my non-California readers (according to my site tracker, people in Nashville, Chicago, and Miami really dig my thoughts), Prop 8 was a deliberate violation of human rights that disabled homosexual couples from legally (as in, in a court house — not church) being married. Prop 2 was basically asking that we give chickens “more legroom.” I never wrote publicly about the election because the internet was ablaze with angry people and I figured, why be another whiny internet user when I can write funny things on my blog instead? Then I had this thought:

What this tells me, California, is that you value the life of a chicken that was bred for your consumption more than you do about equal rights for your fellow man. Uh, hey guys? That’s retarded.

No, I mean. I get it. Animals are cute. I voted wholeheartedly and absentee in favor of the chickens, because I have a very strong animal-rights family and sensitivity for all living creatures myself. When you were voting to pass Prop 2, you were thinking “Oh, yeah. Well, I like animals. Sure!” But it’s about more than that, as is banning gay marriage. Voting on the ban was not about letting the homos catch up to you and possibly beat you in the race of life, you crazy bigots. It was about preventing permanent restrictions on our rights. If you can’t look outside of yourself to find a reason to care, think about a right that you have been afforded as a citizen of this country being taken away from you because you are a part of any marginalized group. If that’s the kinda thing we’re into, then I want to ban all James Franco’s from marrying any not me’s.

Case closed.