sail on, silver girl.

Friday, December 18, 2009

Here are the top 11 things i learned from the Rock & Roll Hall of Fame concert on HBO that I (finally) watched this morning:

Number 11: 
If Ron Howard ever decides to go ahead with “Cocoon: The Musical,” he can hire Crosby, Stills & Nash. Jackson Browne & James Taylor to be the leads.

Number 10:
 “Anyone who’s ever had a heart / wouldn’t turn around and break it” is one of the most perfect lyrics ever. 

Number 9:
 Smokey Robinson is one sexy bitch. By the time he growl yelled the last “baby, baby take a good look at my face…” during “tracks of my tears,” even I was ready to sleep with him.

Number 8: 
Robert Trujillo is the best thing to happen to Metallica since group therapy. 

Number 7:
 Aretha Franklin doesn’t duet… so much as she dominates.

Number 6:
 I’m convinced that Stevie Wonder is not actually a real human being, but that he is just feeling, personified. Heaviest moment of the night award goes to him. While singing Michael Jackson’s “The Way You Make Me Feel,”  he became visibly choked up and started crying, unable to finish the last verse.

Number 5: 
Mick Jagger is an island. U2 is a kibbutz.

Number 4:
 Art Garfunkel is the MVP of my life.  Who knew that goofy looking MF was so passionate? He BROUGHT it. And the last lines of “Bridge Over Troubled Water” made me cry like a ‘tween watching “The Notebook” after a bad breakup.

Number 3:
 12 words and an ampersand I never thought I would say: I will see the shit out of a Simon & Garfunkel reunion tour.

Number 2: If Patti Smith sang to me that the world was flat, that global warming was a farce, and that we were all descended from an alien race of sheep… I would believe her.

Number 1:
 If there is a youtube feed at my funeral, I want to loop the moment when Springsteen is singing the chorus of “I still haven’t found what I’m looking for,” while Bono harmonizes with him, singing “Promised Land.”